Breaking the News

Charlie was, of course, right. But, I did consider keeping the news to myself. Not for long--just until I processed the news, until the pregnancy was viable, until the child was born, etc. To be honest, I was a little worried about how he'd take it.

In the talks we'd been having about the future, having kids someday soon--"neither of us is getting any younger"--was important to us both. But the leap it takes to go from the hypothetical to the here and now is enormous.

As my pregnancy develops, I've read about cute and clever ways mommas have revealed the big news.  How I wish I had one of those stories to share. Mine, though, could best be described as a fumble. Following my conversation with Charlie, I joined Shoots at his parents home to finish watching the Bobcat-Eastern Washington football game. Later, as we drove to dinner at McKenzie River Pizza, I asked him: "Hypothetically speaking, if I suspected I had developed some kind of health condition, would you want to know as right away, or once it was actually confirmed by a doctor?"

With that as the backdrop, you're probably imagining traffic noises and a crash to follow. That's just how it sounded in my head, once the words escaped my mouth. Instead, he eyed me with a measured look, took my hand, and said: "Hey, what's going on? Do you need to tell me something?" Shrugging it off as curiosity, I asked to talk about it after dinner. Subsequently, as we stood hugging in his living room, I explained that I wasn't sure how it happened or even if it was accurate, but I was, most likely, pregnant. And though my approach was far from flawless, his response was. It's something I will never forget. He kissed me and said: "I don't see this as a bad thing. Sweetie, I'm excited. It feels right."

And that is where this post should have ended. But having a profound dislike of getting things wrong, double checking my work (and others) is common practice for me. So, we reviewed the results and decided to try test #2. Funny thing, it didn't work. The control line didn't show which meant it was invalid. By this time, it is late and all the stores are closed. It would have to wait--which is no favorite of mine.

To tell the truth, it was a blessing. Because as it turns out, I was the one freaking out a bit. The possibility that maybe it was inaccurate was the cup of warm milk I needed to go to sleep. For a couple of hours, anyway. Then I was up researching all things pregnancy related: signs and symptoms, accuracy rates of home pregnancy tests, conception and due date calendars, etc.

At 5:55 am, I drove to Albertson's and bought a digital home pregnancy test. I'd read these are harder to misread as it says the word "pregnant" or "not pregnant," instead of using a plus or minus. And wouldn't you know, the word "pregnant" stared me in the face. When Shoots woke up, I told him and asked if he wanted to use the second test in the second package. He laughed and said he didn't. We agreed that I would go to my family doctor the next day and "make sure" with a blood test--but we both already knew we had a secret.